Article source: http://topten.org/ . 文章来源： http://topten.org/ 。 Used with author's permission. 用作者的许可。

I run a blog where I discuss the topic of the many games people play in the dating arena.我跑的博客，我讨论的议题很多游戏的人在舞台上的约会。 I've posted hundreds of articles, many of which point out many of these troubles.我已发布数百条，其中有许多指出其中的许多麻烦。 Even if you haven't read the blog, you probably are aware of some of these schemes.即使你没有看过的博客，你可能都知道其中的一些计划。 While I wish it were easy to sum everything up into one neat, overlying problem, it's not that simple.虽然我希望它很容易总结一切成一个整洁，覆问题，这不是那么简单。 Let me point out just a few of the issues.让我指出几个问题。

For one, there's a definite lack of respect in dating nowadays.一方面，有一定的不尊重约会现在。 People don't even care about their partners enough to treat them as they deserve to be treated.人们甚至不关心自己的合作伙伴足够的对待他们，他们应该得到的待遇。 Gossip, ridiculously high expectations, and rejections by ignorance are only some of the examples in this area.闲话，可笑很高的期望，并拒绝愚昧只是一些例子在这个领域。 Grandparents are always carrying on about how today's generation has such a lack of respect.祖父母总是进行有关如何今天的一代已经这样一个缺乏尊重。 They talk about how, in their day, people cared about others and banded together through difficult problems.他们谈到了如何在他们的天，人们关心他人，通过联合起来困难的问题。 Why do they talk about these things?为什么他们谈论这些事情？ Because they're right!因为他们的权利！ Through every activity in which I've been involved, I've encountered this problem.通过每一项活动，其中我一直在参与，我遇到这个问题。 I'm tired of working for a hundred hours on a video project when the president of the organization receives but doesn't bother to even reply to your E-Mails asking him to review it.我厌倦了工作的100个小时的视频项目当总统的组织收到，但不打扰，甚至回复您的电子邮件，要求他对其进行审核。 I'm sick of being ostracized from groups because I don't care to participate in their petty disagreements.我病被排斥于群体，因为我不在乎参加其小的分歧。 And I'm exhausted after people expect me to work to death in volunteer organizations!我用尽后，人们期待我的工作死刑的志愿者组织！

There are always exceptions to this rule, and I'm sure that there are many people who do have a great deal of respect for both their peers and their elders.总是有例外，这条规则，我敢肯定，有许多人谁做了大量的尊重他们的同事和他们的长辈。 Unfortunately, the majority, or at least the majority with the most influence, simply don't care.不幸的是，大多数，或至少与大多数最有影响力，根本没有照顾。

Second, nobody is honest with themselves, let alone anyone else.第二，没有人是诚实的与自己，更不用说其他人。 Dating has turned into a torrent of backstabbing of which even Mark Burnett would be proud.约会变成了洪流backstabbing ，其中甚至马克伯内特将自豪。 Asking someone out is nearly impossible, because the gossip about it has already spread to a thousand people before you make the move.有人问了几乎是不可能的，因为流言有关它已经蔓延到几千人，然后再作出行动。 Then, when a rejection occurs (even if it's not rude), the rejector spreads rumors around to all his/her friends that cause them to completely ignore you, refusing to invite you to parties or even to initiate conversations with you.然后，当发生排斥反应（即使不是粗鲁） ，在滤波器周围传播谣言的所有他/她的朋友，使他们完全无视你，拒绝邀请你，甚至开始与你交谈。 The biggest insult is that even if you asked point-blank, you'd still never get a truthful answer as to why such harm was directed towards you.最大的侮辱是，即使你问点空白，您还是永远无法获得真实的答案，为什么这种损害是针对你。

As if what occurs after a rejection isn't enough, people attempt to steal others' girl/boyfriends.至于如果发生后，拒绝是不够的，人企图窃取他人的姑娘/男朋友。 One day, things are going well, and the next you find yourself wondering what happened to the relationship that was forming - that is, until you notice that person spending a lot of time with who you thought was your best friend.有一天，一切进展顺利，接下来的你会发现自己不知道发生了什么的关系，这是形成-也就是说，直到你通知的人花了很多时间，你认为谁是你最好的朋友。 No explanation is offered, not even a "good-bye."没有任何解释提供，甚至没有一个“再见。 ”

Third, people are not looking for someone who spends his or her time working to get ahead instead of getting flat-out drunk, who doesn't curse at or ignore his or her mate, and who actually makes time for whatever is occurring between them (whether it be a full-fledged relationship or just plain sex).第三，人不找人谁花他或她的工作时间出人头地而不是越来越平了喝醉了，谁不骂或忽视他或她的队友，谁的时间实际上是不论他们之间发生（无论是正式的关系或只是普通性） 。 They say they're looking for these things, but in reality, they're attracted to people with the attributes described above.他们说，他们正在寻找这些东西，但在现实中，他们吸引到人与上文所述的属性。 "Confidence" is not the answer to the equation. “信心”是不是解决问题的答案的方程。 Assuming they both possess the same level of "confidence," the above-described person would win every time over the "warm, caring, and intelligent" (wo)man that people claim is the ideal mate.假设他们都拥有同等水平的“信心” ，上述人士将每次比赛的“温暖，关怀，与智能” （我）人，人声称是理想的伴侣。

The list of problems goes on.该名单的问题不胜枚举。 You might be intrigued to hear that while the problems seem innumerable, I propose they can all be rectified with the simplest of solutions.您可能会感兴趣地听到，而问题似乎无数，我建议他们都能够得到纠正与最简单的解决办法。 There's no danger involved, nobody has to lead radical changes, and it doesn't involve an "impossible" fight against biology.没有危险的参与，没有人导致剧烈的变化，它不涉及一个“不可能”打击生物学。

I simply propose for men to stop asking women out.我只是提出男子制止，要求女性。

Not for the rest of your life, but for just a short time, say, a month.没有其他的生命，但只有很短的时间，比如说一个月。 It's not impossible, and you won't have to do it as much after the month passes.这不是不可能的，你不会有这样做了一个月后的通行证。 While there are a few (rare) exceptions, the vast majority of women don't ask out men 50% of the time.虽然有一些（罕见）例外，绝大多数的妇女不要问了男子50 ％的时间。 Women do have the advantage in dating, and it's time to level the playing field.妇女做的好处在约会，而且时间公平的竞争环境。 Sure, talk with women as friends, and if someone initiates a conversation with you, then definitely reciprocate.当然，跟女性朋友，如果有人启动与你交谈，然后肯定回应。 However, let the woman ask you out if she's interested, no matter how attractive she is to you.然而，让她问你，如果她的兴趣，无论多么有吸引力的，她是给你。

Some women have never asked anyone out in their lives.有些妇女从来没有要求任何人在他们的生命。 It's no wonder why these women continually treat men like they're lower beings.难怪为什么这些妇女不断地对待男人一样，他们是较低的人。 If they had to put up with the rejections that most men do all the time, I guarantee that they would have more respect for men.如果他们不得不忍受的拒绝，大多数人做所有的时间，我保证，他们会更加尊重人。 Women would no longer put up with moving from guy to guy based on who was interested in her at the moment.妇女将不再忍受从家伙的家伙对谁感兴趣的是她在的时刻。 And spreading gossip about potential romantic interests certainly isn't going to help one's prospects.散布流言和潜在的浪漫的利益当然不会帮助一个人的前景。

People need to realize that humans, for all their ancestry, are not monkeys or horses or rabbits.人们需要认识到，人类，对所有的祖先，不是猴子或马，或兔子。 They're humans, who can think and act for themselves.他们是人，谁可以思考和采取行动的。

Men have so much more capacity in the dating arena than constantly looking for sex at all costs, if they would only exercise it.男子会有如此大容量更大的舞台上约会比不断寻找色情不惜一切代价，如果他们只会行使。 It's time to stop being prisoners to so-called "biology."现在是时候停止囚犯所谓“生物学” 。 Women have the same urges men do, and they should do half the work, not 10% or 20%.妇女有相同的敦促男人，他们应该做的工作的一半，而不是10 ％或20 ％ 。

There are a lot of "seduction communities" on the Internet that teach men how to "seduce" women.有很多“诱惑社区”在互联网上的教导男人如何“勾引”妇女。 I don't know of any similar organization that teaches women how to impress men with the same fervor.我不知道有任何类似的组织，教导妇女如何打动男人同样的热情。

There's my proposal.有我的建议。 I don't think it's hard to implement.我不认为这很难实施。 Imagine if all the men even at one corporation or university decided to ban together.试想，如果所有的男人，即使在一个公司或大学决定禁止在一起。 Laziness won't be a problem, becausenobody even has to do anything.懒惰不会成为问题，甚至有becausenobody做任何事情。 It's time to change our distorted culture.现在是时候改变我们扭曲的文化。 All I'm suggesting is to promote equality.我的所有建议是为了促进平等。 Is that such a bad thing?这是一件坏事？

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